Sunday, May 17, 2009

An Exciting Weekend

Thursday, May 7, was an exciting day for Caleb! Not only did he turn two months old, but he also got to meet his Aunt Julie and Uncle Chris, who were visiting from South Carolina. Then, later that day, he got to meet his grandma and grandpa, who were also visiting from South Carolina! Here are a few pics from the days of their visits.

Chillin' on a Sunday afternoon

hanging out with Uncle Matt and Aunt Leah several weeks ago

Friday, May 15, 2009

Update...and a few pictures at last!

The last post was written prior to Caleb's appointment with the ophthalmologist. I'm happy to report that the appointment went very well! The doctor did not find anything structurally wrong with Caleb's eyes. He wants us to return in two months, and hopefully Caleb's eyes will have developed further by that time so he will be making eye contact, etc. We are still waiting for the neurologist's office to contact us regarding the MRI they are scheduling. I have called a couple times to check on it, but to no avail.

I was still feeling unsettled after the appointment. It's good to know that there is nothing wrong with Caleb's eyes, but why doesn't he respond to us? We are not the only ones who have noticed and been concerned about his lack of interaction. But anyway, God did something so sweet for me that night. At 5:30 in the morning, Caleb looked at me and smiled! It was so encouraging.

With all that has been going on, I am very behind on posting pictures! I only have time to post a few right now, but I will try to do more later this weekend.

Caleb is meeting my good friend, Amy. She has had two different types of leukemia, and she had a bone marrow transplant just over a year ago. She calls her donor "Caleb."

We realized how big he was getting when I went in to get him up from his nap and his onesie was halfway down his chest! Notice the pitiful tear tracks. :(
Happy Easter! My brother Matt got to come home on leave for a few weeks, and Caleb met him on Easter Sunday.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

I'm Giving You My Dreams

I love the song "Surrender" by Marc James. This line falls partway through the first verse: "I'm giving you my dreams." I remember the first time that line became intensely personal to me. Joel and I were engaged, and he had been deployed in Cuba for 10 months. As you can imagine, I had been dreaming about and imagining his homecoming. Then there was a hurricane, and I received word that he would be delayed. It would be a brief delay, a few days at most, but I was bitterly disappointed and having a hard time with it emotionally. God reminded me of that line in the song, and He asked me if I was willing to give him my dreams and trust that His plan was best. After all, He was in control of the weather! And so I did. (For those wondering how it turned out, Joel was only delayed by one day. Some of my girlfriends came over on the evening of the day he was originally scheduled to return, and we had a wonderful time! I wouldn't go back and change it if I could.)

"I'm giving you my dreams" has once again become the line upon which surrender hinges. It seems that there's something wrong with my baby boy, and we don't yet know what. Is he blind? Brain damaged? Autistic? God is asking me to give him my dreams about Caleb, and it's quite difficult. If I have to, can I give up the dream of that little boy running to give me a hug? Watching out the back window while Joel teaches him to throw a football? Gathering in the living room on a Sunday afternoon to cheer on the Chicago Bears? I may not have to give up those dreams, but if it becomes necessary, can I do it? Really, there's no choice. Or more accurately, the choice has already been made. Unless I abandon everything I believe, I have to surrender those dreams to the Lord and trust that He is good and wise and sovereign. His plans for Joel and Caleb and me are best, even if I don't understand them. "I'm giving you my dreams."